My Eating Disorder Dietitian Saved My Life

Anyone who has read Running in Silence knows that I was convinced to take on “macronutrient” or “lifestyle” diets. I wasn’t sure how to decipher correct nutrition information when there were published books about the wonders of these diets, and when the leaders of such diets were boasting about the benefits. And if a certain diet wasn’t working for me, I believed it was because I wasn’t doing it right, or going through “detox.”

As someone who was in a vulnerable spot with my body image, running, and eating disorder, these diets felt like a way out. Each one felt like freedom and a fix for my “broken” appetite. Only, embarking on these diets actually made everything even more confusing. It made it difficult to go out to eat, to have enough “good” food, and the cravings I had were the most intense cravings I had ever experienced in my life.

I thought I was in control, but the food was in control of me and everything else I did.

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Eating Disorders vs. Healthy Eating

(Thank you to for sponsoring this post, with their link on anxiety included in the final paragraph. I received compensation as a thank-you for my participation, and believe offering links to resources like this may be of help to some.)

Let’s say a friend chooses to order a salad while the rest of your friends order pizza. Is this friend restricting calories to lose weight? Or does he want a salad right now because pizza doesn’t sound appetizing at the moment?

Some people may eat in a way that makes others think, eating disorder.

But you can’t point to every raw foodist and claim they have an eating disorder. You can’t claim every vegan is masking a bigger problem. And you don’t want to assume that just because someone eats a seemingly balanced diet that they don’t have disordered eating. Some may eat in restrictive ways to avoid food allergies or find that they feel better eating this way, while others use “gluten intolerance” or “raw food diet” as an excuse to carry out their eating disorder behaviors in a more convincing way.

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