Being Told “You’re Not Sick Enough” (Guest Post by Emily Kopacz)
Trigger warning: eating disorder behaviors mentioned.
A lump formed in my throat as I walked towards my college’s wellness center. Two days prior I had had my first appointment with a nutritionist at a practice specialized in eating disorder treatment. The nutritionist, horrified specifically by my laxative abuse, advised that I get a blood panel as soon as possible and that the easiest way to get one was to notify my college’s health center and go from there.
When I was called in by the nurse practitioner, I felt my stomach tie itself in knots. I did not want to tell my eating disorder story again to yet another medical professional. The more I had to explain my eating disorder, the more I questioned if I even had one.
“What brings you in today?” The nurse asked me as I sat down on the crinkly paper seat covering.
My chest tightened; my heart raced.
“I need to get a blood panel done. Are you guys able to do that here?”
“Why do you need a blood panel?” The nurse asked, now looking me up and down.
“I was recently diagnosed with an eating disorder and was advised by my nutritionist to get a blood panel done,” I said, all in one breath.
“I really don’t think you need one,” the nurse said dismissively.
“What?” I said, taken aback.